OH MY GOD...YES, IT'S THE DEWEY DECIMAL RAP.

You know you've "made it" when kids are making their own mocking versions....



I like this LIBRARY RAP:



I'm going to tell every fool who comes into the bookstore wanting to use it like a library - by purchasing stuff (books - or worse, DVDs that they've WATCHED - yes, opened the shrinkwrap) and then returning it - over and over again - to WATCH THESE VIDEOS! UGH... I've asked customers: "Why don't you just go to the library?" "The what?" they ask. "The Library." "What is a library?" S-C-A-R-Y.

OR what's really funny/scary is what happened once: I guy came up to me and said
"Where can I rent this?"
"Rent this?" inquired
"Yeah. Rent this," he said, as he held up a book.
"I said, "You mean check it out, like you do in a library."
He said "Yeah."
I repeated "Check this OUT?"
He nodded.
"I said "Like a LIBRARY?"
He said "Yeah."
I said "This isn't a library. It's a bookstore."
He just stared.
"Um...You have to buy the book," I added.
"I can't rent it?" he asked.
"No," I said.
Mind you, he WAS NOT foreign. He did not have an accent.
"I have to buy it?"
"Yes."
"Then I don't want it," he said.
"Well why don't you go to the library," I suggested.
"What's a library," he said.
"You know, you can check out books and stuff," I said.
"Oh," he said. "Well where is one?" he asked.
I explained where to go.
"It's too far away," he said, and walked away.

I told my sister, who works at the Columbia University Library, to check out these raps and she said, "I'm not that kind of librarian. I'm not a library dork." Oh, dear sister, we all are. YOU ESPECIALLY.